27-MAR-2021_toughest training course
(Jesus speaking: ) You think it’s a nice thing to be a Christian? No. In fact it’s one of the toughest training courses around. It’s not for weak livered and feed-themselves-first slobs. You’ve got to give everything until you are bleeding and in want. You’ve got to love with all you have those who have repeatedly hurt you. 
You have to give up all you have to gain something you have yet to see or know if it is even real. You have to love a God that takes everything away from you and allows the deepest suffering, and trust that it’s going to work out for good in the end. 
So, do you want to be a Christian, a true one? It’s tough. Yes, you can believe on Me, and love My sweet sugary words. But a full, all the way Christian disciple, are you up for that? It’s tough and only for the bravest. 
That’s why I said to count the costs, because those who go only part way and then leave, or worse become traitors, are judged sternly. Only come if you can give all. And keep giving all as your “all” means new things. One day it might mean one thing, and then later on when new things are added to you, “forsake all” means an entirely new thing. But giving all for Me, and loving the brethren fervently is what you are meant to do. 
I’m tough, I know. But you will be rewarded for love. Love is really hard, and can only be done with the help of My loving Holy Spirit. Take more in, and you can give more love more freely. It’s not just about flesh, but loving their heart and showing it in the kind way you speak and interact.
Everyone will hurt you and keep hurting you. You can’t keep stored up rocks against people—rocks you think should be thrown to punish them. That is what a “grudge” is, stashed up rocks that you think should be meted out to them. But boy, that sure weighs you down.
We are cleaning you out and “lightening your load”—bringing light and allowing you to go on lighter of foot. 
Let’s cry together for the pain we feel. I’ll cry long and hard with you. You won’t cry alone. But remember, all things will work together for good to them that love God. 
Just keeping the vortex going of punishments lashed out at brethren and new hurts coming and new things to punish yet again isn’t going to help. It’s when the cycle is broken through My redeeming forgiveness that you step out and new life can be born. 
Lie down and let Me take the load off of you. Do you love Me more than these? Will you rather have Me and My full loving forgiveness?